A day (or two or three) in the life of...

Cuz toosie roll wrappers are all I see... on my desk? I'm a tootsie roll fiend but I won't go buy my own bag, no, that means I purposely set out to eat it all. See the logic? I like someone else's tootsie rolls because they're much more delicious. My boss keeps bags and containers of candies and pretzels and other snacks in his office and it keeps me going back to get more snacks and pretend I have something pressing to talk about. I walk towards him purposefully then make a sharp right turn to the candy jar and quickly sort through them to pick out all the tootsie rolls I can find and that will fit in my hand and I turn to him, thank him, he shakes his head, I giggle and scurry back to my desk. Ouch. Now my tummy hurts. I have seriously eaten 23 tootsie rolls today (I counted). I've never eaten this many before in my life. Not in one day at least. Suddenly I got a flashback to that old song 69 boyz song: "cotton candy, sweet to go, lemme see that tootsie ...

I swear I do. I don't think of myself as so jaded that I can't accept another person into my heart and hope for the best, right? I really want to believe that two people can fall in love, commit to eachother and really work on it consistently in order to keep that love alive and well and remember on a regular basis everything that made them fall in love to begin with. I mean, most relationships have their flaws and that's cool but if you promise forever to eachother, shouldn't you at least really give it all you've got? I look at older married couples as my love heros and examples of two people who really meant it when they made their promises to eachother. This couple seemed like such a happy couple, didn't they? But, then again, in that whole glitzy Hollywood lifestyle, making it as long as they did is comparable to about a 30 year 'un-Hollywood' marriage. There's so many elements to each person's own personal idea of a great relationshi...

So, I went to a cousin's wedding this past weekend. I had planned on going shopping to find a properly fitting dress (no_thing in my closet is fitting me right now as I have the opposite problem that I used to have w/fitting in clothes) so that I could look fabulous and feel all kinds of confident and stuff... I lured in a +1 , put on my dancing shoes and off we went... Wedding was ok but it was a Catholic ceremony which lasted... wait for it... an hour and a half. Oof. "Please rise for a reading... please sit now... please stand for.... Please be seated...Rise for a rendition of Ave Maria... ". So, at the very least, I got a squat comparable workout and my glutes were in fine form by Sunday morning. Once we got to the reception, I made a beeline for the open bar. Someone offered to take my coat, which I took her up and but my feet didn't stop moving in making my way to the bar while she was slipping my coat off. After that long ceremony, this chicky was parched....

Back when I was even more poor than I am today, Mikey, Claudio and I used to indulge in sushi dinners at least once if not twice a week and when we did, we really had the good stuff. We took turns paying (it feels more loving and ritualistic when you're not sitting there dividing the bill up and crunching numbers right there at the table and instead just inviting eachother to these indulgences) and had the best time everytime we went. I miss having regular sushi partners. I mean, Jems and I go every so often when I convince him that we can pretend that we're not broke but that's really not very often at all anymore. I miss it! I crave raw salmon, just slabs of it, dipped in a soy sauce and wasabi combination and washed down w/hot sake. Mmmmm. Damn, my cravings. It's Isabella, she wants the sushi, not me. So you see, I need to feed the baby. She likes sake too? Either Mikey needs to come back to DC area (I'm not letting down on this one, Blondie) or I need to st...

"Showers washing all my cares away..." Word. Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday sucked. Today, not so sucky. I'm loving the rain, feeling pretty settled in a couple senses though still hanging on my last hopes for refi to successfully happen in next couple weeks (after having hopes dashed multiple times and then raised again, this time it's do or die so we'll see) but this time I'm feeling confident that it actually will happen. Too much bad has happened for that one final piece not to fall in place for me. So, I woke up and just layed in bed this morning and wanted so badly to just stay home. I wanted to throw some nice bath salts in the jacuzzi, crank up the jets and sip champagne as the rain hit against the window above the tub... but reality kicked in and in order for the refi to go through, I need to actually prove I have employment and well, staying home today might have hindered that so up and out I went. Today is the kind of day, though,...

We'll never know... It is a mystery. Or not... Confirmed, I am a goofball (it was in question before) . Put me in a hotel room in Venice, give me some fine Chianti, surround me with all my newly purchased carnivale masks and put a camera in my hand and well... the result... [shaking head] Because I can (and often do) laugh at myself, I give you permission to as well. Venetian carnivale masks are the new lip gloss. Flirty, fun, you can match 'em w/each outfit and makes you look years younger! Can't wait to wear my cat one out. MeOW. Maybe I'll pair it w/my onesie PJ's tonight and go trick or treating. Oh wait, no, it's supposed to rain still, isn't it?

First of all, w/out going into details here, I have good reason to feel a bit on edge lately in regards to trust. Not anything for blog sharing but enough to shake up my weekend nice and good. So I had this dream last night that I was being betrayed but I didn't know by whom but I was apparently keeping my closest family and friends at my side 24/7 in hopes of keeping my inner circle air tight. It was weird, we were all sleeping in this huge bed, together all the time and I'm feeling safe but then I find out that one of my cousins was sending Lucifer emails about my whereabouts and fund situations in the middle of the night from my laptop while I was sleeping (In actuality, I don't particularly trust this cousin that intensly so it's not so far fetched) . In this dream, I guess I had looked in my 'sent' folder and saw the emails in all their gritty details and I called my cousin out on it. At first he just denied it and looked at me with a blank expression a...

I tried putting on a different pair of earrings to replace the nekked appearance on my lobes yesterday but it was not cute. I had these garnet studs that were heart shaped (they were a Valentines present from he who we shall not speak his name... what can I do? All of my jewelry, save for one pair of earrings are from him) and they just looked all wrong everytime I caught a glimpse of my reflection. Well, I was strongly considering (almost pretty sure actually) the option Busted offered up of the jeweler up there in NJ that carries loose stones and would very cheaply put it in a new setting to match my other earbling. Cut to this morning. I was going into the Jeep to grab a deposit slip from yesterday (because it's not showing up today and I have till midnight to make this blasted mortgage payment so something's gotta give here folks) and what was sparkling from the crevice of the driver's seat (heh...) but the lost diamond earring. This is the most persistent diamond e...

So, speaking of self improvments, on a surface note, I'm trying to change up my hair style a bit because I'm over mine. You have to understand though, that I never do anything that drastic w/my hair. I usually leave it at lengths varying from past my chin to past my boobs and some layers cut in there. I've had some bangs for the past year and a half (almost 2 years now) and I'm over them in a big way. Now that it's windy, it's hard to keep my hair from looking a mess when my bangs are flying around and not laying swept to the side as I put them in the mornings. I just want to be able to really wash and go again and not worry about them if I don't have the time. I've gone back to dying my hair jet black again because a)summer's over b) I can't afford the salon visits anymore and c)I was missing the dark black. Now I just need to succeed in growing these bangs out w/out looking like a shaggy mess for next couple months and then decide on a st...

I haven't felt so blog chatty lately because my usual idle thoughts that bring me giggles and leave me pondering random pop culture factoids in between working and watching TV have been replaced by more active thoughts regarding what I need to do to put myself in the right direction and this surge of motivation that's been kicked into me. It started before my trip to Italy. I found myself embarrassed and tired of saying "oh, I'd like to do .... and I need to work on .... topping my list of things to strive for is .... I'll start next week ..." and one or two people who would hold me to what I say (actually, Gibson's the best at calling me out on that kinda stuff and I mean that in a good way, even though I may initially snap back defensively when being called out) would be met w/evasive responses that made it clear that I was getting nowhere with myself in general and don't appreciate being reminded of it. This sounds like a self help book prologu...